How to Cope with Eco Anxiety as a Parent
- Rachel Bailleau
- Apr 7
- 10 min read
Updated: 14 hours ago
As parents, it’s common to experience eco-anxiety. The news is filled with frightening stories about climate change, and worrying about the future is a reasonable and rational response to an uncertain world. But I want you to know that it's possible to turn climate fear and paralysis into hope and positive action - for the good of yourself, your kids and the living world. Let’s explore some practical strategies for coping with eco-anxiety as a parent.
Understanding Eco-Anxiety as a Parent
The good news is that you are not alone! Parents have always faced uncertainty about the future. Until the early 20th Century, the infant mortality rate was still at 50% in some places of the UK! Parents have worried about plagues, famine, and war splitting apart their families for most of human history. In many ways, this is the best time we could have had our children. Hot water in taps? Light and warmth at the click of a button? Free medical care available for everyone in the UK? These things are the stuff of dreams for our ancestors.
But it's true that we're also facing modern difficulties. We lucky parents have had the existential threat of climate change and biodiversity collapse slopped onto our worry plate.
Even worse, we now get climate disasters livestreamed to us from around the world and beamed to the telephone in our pockets, where we can doomscroll on the news and social media for hours a day. This constant barrage of negative news can make us feel anxious, especially when we think about our children's futures. And it's something that our ancestors didn't have to deal with - they just had to hear about the bad news in their mountain village, not every disaster from every corner of the world in real time.
To be clear - feeling overwhelmed by eco-anxiety and climate grief doesn't mean there is anything wrong with you. There is a lot wrong with the world (and a lot right with it, too). Still, you are not broken, stupid, or over the top for feeling upset that our planet needs help - especially when your children are likely to live much longer than you and experience the impacts of the decisions we make today even more deeply.
The problem is that eco-anxiety can often lead to feelings of paralysis. When faced with enormous challenges, it's easy to feel our actions won't make a difference, so we hold up our hands and say there's nothing we can do. While we try to distract ourselves from our authentic feelings and don't take any action, dread and panic take root and spread inside of us. But it isn't sustainable for ourselves, our children, or the living world for us to do nothing while feeling awful.
Instead of being submerged in eco-anxiety, we can cultivate an attitude of hope and optimism. This can give us the energy and motivation to contribute to a better world for our children and our communities. By taking small steps and focusing on hope, we can teach our kids about compassion, hope, and resilience - all while making a real difference.
Nurturing Hope in Uncertain Times
I understand how hard it is to balance eco-anxiety with having a family. There was a time when I didn't think I could bring a child into a world filled with uncertainty. I wanted to be a mother, but it seemed absolutely impossible to "inflict life" on an unsuspecting egg and sperm when the world might be a burning wasteland of toxic gas by the time they made it to adulthood. I wish I could say I was exaggerating for comedic effect, but I really did believe that we were all going to die a slow and painful death due to climate-related disasters and that the fewer of us around to face apocalyptic doom, the better.
I'm now able to smile at the fears I had in the past. I want to give that poor young lady a hug and invite her to spend a few weeks with me and my beautiful family. Today, I live in an off-grid home in the middle of a forest teeming with life. I take my baby daughter out walking in a carrier, and we jump over clear streams with electric blue kingfishers darting ahead of us and fill baskets with wild food like mushrooms, chestnuts, and hedge garlic. My rescue dogs run ahead, fighting over sticks and rolling in whatever wild animal poop has been deposited on the forest tracks that day. (Hey, life isn't free from crap - even today!)
I look down at my baby girl Odette, and she reaches out to touch the leaves and wildflowers. And I feel happy and hopeful and determined to dedicate my life to her future rather than succumb to despair. I know that the world needs us to act - I spent the last 6 years working as a climate change and biodiversity researcher and journalist. But I also know there are many reasons to be hopeful - and my daughter is worth fighting for!
Maybe you, too, could do something drastic like build an off-grid home and forage for food with your kids. But don't worry, you don't have to! Whether you live in the city or a mountain valley, there are things you can do to engage with nature and reduce your eco-anxiety. In the process of rediscovering hope, we can teach our children about environmental stewardship and kindness towards all living beings. This light-hearted approach allows them to develop a sense of responsibility for the world around them - while experiencing the joy and wonder that they deserve to feel.
Reconnect with Nature
One powerful way to reduce eco-anxiety is to reconnect with nature. This can be beneficial for our mental and physical health, give us an opportunity to get outside and spend time with our children, and remind us that the world is beautiful. It's worth fighting for!
Here are some practical ways to engage with nature:
Weekly Nature Walks: If possible, get outside to walk in nature with your kids at least once a week. If you don't have access to the countryside, try finding a natural space in the city to walk, like along a river or a city park. Put your phone on silent and try to be really present with your kids.
Gardening Together: Grow some food at home. It can be as simple as planting herbs or flowers in pots on a windowsill. Growing and eating plants together is fun, and can teach your kids useful skills for the future. (I hope and believe the world can become a better place as Odette gets older, but I'm also committed to teach her how to grow and forage for food and to defend herself - it's nice to have every base covered!) If you haven't grown food before, radishes are pretty indestructible and grow super quickly - so you might want to start there!
Become Nature Literate: I used to open the window and hear "birds" or walk in the forest and see "plants". But now, I hear robins, greater woodpeckers, and blackbirds, and I see St Johns Wort, Common Mallow, and Cuckoo Pints. By learning the names of different plants and animals, you will start noticing more details and feel a closer connection to the natural world. You can start by trying to learn one new species a day - hopefully one you can see or touch right in front of you, but curling up with a foraging book, a blanket and a cup of tea also works! You can learn about which plants are edible, and make simple dishes with your kids like dandelion and plantain salads or start a list of all the birds you've spotted in a year. This is a great way to learn together and get outside. As you learn more about the natural world, you'll naturally want to protect it, all while experiencing joy.
Display Positive Activism
Taking concrete actions - however small - can really help us feel less anxious and more empowered. Instead of feeling helpless, you can channel your energy into actions that foster change. Here are a couple of ideas of ways to do something constructive with your children:
Participate in Community Clean-Ups: Join local initiatives to clean parks, beaches, or rivers. Involve your children and encourage them to bring along some of their friends. You might want to check out "The Great British Beach Clean" to start.
Support Local Farmers: If it's affordable to your family, you could purchase fruits and vegetables from farmers' markets or subscribe to a local vegetable box. This supports local food security and teaches children about the importance of local agriculture. Local food isn't necessarily better for the planet - it's only one part of the story. But personally, my eco anxiety has always been closely linked to food security and whether my kids will have access to healthy and plentiful food in the future. This is a way that you can help farmers keep serving your community.
Guerrilla Tree Planting: Guerrilla tree planting is when people plant trees without official permission on land they don’t own, like abandoned lots, neglected parks, roadside edges, or other open spaces. It's a kind of "gentle rebellion." The idea is to take positive action for the environment even when bureaucracy or neglect gets in the way. I have planted a few native fruit trees on the edge of country tracks around our home so that when my daughter is older, we can enjoy apples and cherries on our walks. It's land that's officially owned by the government, far away from anyone that cares what's growing there. And ecological bonus - the birds, deer and wild boar get to eat the fallen fruit, too.
These activities serve a dual purpose—they can alleviate eco-anxiety and help your children form a strong sense of community and responsibility. Do a little research and find out what's happening in your local area - but try to avoid spaces that leave you and your family feeling more anxious than motivated.
Building Resilience Together
One significant aspect of managing eco-anxiety is building resilience. As hard as it is to accept, the climate is already changing. We need to find ways to survive and thrive in the face of uncertainty.
Encourage Open Conversations: I know it can be tempting to change the subject away from climate and biodiversity. But try to welcome your children's concerns. Rather than telling them, "Don't worry, it will be fine", try to be honest without adding fuel to their fear. Try something like, "I get that you're scared; sometimes I'm really worried, too. What do you think we could do to help?" Discuss their worries, validate their feelings, and help them find small concrete actions they can take - from planting wildflower seeds to picking up litter on family walks.
Teach Concrete Skills: Like I already mentioned, it's really important to me to teach Odette concrete skills to navigate the future. If you're worried about your kids future - help them get ready to face anything! Is there a local self-defence class they could participate in? Do they know which foods are edible? Have they got basic survival skills like shelter building or water purification? Learning these skills has benefits for today - building confidence, fitness, and having fun - and for whatever the future might bring.
Hope for the best, Prepare for the worst: I know a lot of blogs will tell you to "foster resilience and empower your children" in quite vague ways. I want you to get real and get moving. The first thing I did when I moved into my house was buy a crate of emergency boat food with a shelf life of seven years. It costs less than going out for dinner, and it has all the calories and nutrients my family needs to survive for a month. Hopefully, we'll never need it and it will end up being chicken food for our happy rescue hens! But it is so reassuring to know that if the supermarkets didn't have food in them tomorrow - my family will be fine for at least a month. After all, your anxiety is there for a reason - it wants to keep you safe! So do what you can to create a little extra security, and this can help you let go of the things that you just can't control.
The Power of Community Support
Feeling connected to a supportive community can significantly alleviate eco-anxiety. Surrounding ourselves with like-minded parents and individuals who share similar concerns can feel like a light coming on in the dark. But be careful about who you spend time with! You don't need to hang out with people who leave you feeling sick to the stomach and like all hope is lost. All hope is NOT lost - and there is so much going right in the world. But even if that wasn't true, you deserve to spend time with people who contribute to the health and happiness of yourself and your family.
For a start, you could look for local or online parenting circles focusing on sustainability and eco-friendly practices. These groups foster support, sharing tips, resources, and encouragement.
But give people a chance. I used to be too picky about who I spent time with. I thought that if people didn't grieve for the planet like I did, the friendship couldn't be very authentic. But since I let go of this idea and started connecting with a wider range of people at Mums and Tots, I realised that we have something in common with every parent: our love for our kids! Sprnding time with less militant people can bring some balance into our anxious lives.
Looking Towards a Brighter Future
While eco-anxiety is a genuine concern, it doesn’t have to define our experience as parents. Embracing hope and taking positive action has clear benefits for both ourselves and our children.
By engaging with nature, participating in community activism, and building resilience, we can cultivate an environment where hope thrives. This will benefit not only our families but also the earth that we pass on to future generations.
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